Have I a brain that drips like water of a tree full of life.
At the most I have been filled with a spirit of intellectual craving. I have been needed some type of stimulation that I have been getting from television as of lately.
Today I was blessed with the ability to watch the movie The Theory of Everything, which is a great film about the life story of Stephen Hawking. I have to say that this movie was absolutely great. It really brought up a lot of my similar ideas. The seemingly hopeless wife stuck between her faith and her husband. The fact that God's mind would be a higher level of thinking. The love that we feel from our higher bodies was really resonate in this film. I found it oh-to-coincidental that the actor portraying our beloved Dr. Hawking is also the actor that plays a noble inter-dimensional "God" in the film Jupiter Ascending, but please do not get me going before I sit here all night ranting on and on about the half dozen conspiracy theories I could form up just about that. None the less I still do not know that actors name. Well I went ahead and searched up his name; Eddie Redmayn.
I have been battling my own mind attempting to train myself to love and appreciate my need to go back to highschool and finish for my diploma. In the world I choose to live within it is a requirement to push forward and strive to be the most educated being that I can be. And it makes me feel almost squashed to be required to go to school. I notice this about myself and would like to see a change in energy.
Perhaps I should refer to it as a shift. I would like to shift my negative energy into a more positive outlet, that way I can see that beautiful electric flow. And surely I have seen my share of godly tests in my endeavours. Just today I had three tests of my ability to maintain sobriety. Firstly, I met a group of two fellow energy beings testing their freedom by enjoying a fine drink of a favorite mind altering substance of mine marijuana. Secondly, on the way towards catching the bus I find half a rolled marijuana joint. Thirdly, I encounter old friends enjoying Tennessee Honey, which I almost thought was something safe to drink. I feel no negativity towards these events because I was capable to stick with my natural course. But all the while I still managed to trudge down the road of nicotine addiction.
In a simpler time I would not have worried about addiction. Heck, in a time like this I could easily do all the doing that I would like and still manage to live off the small wages provided for me. But I seek out more comfort than the need to be dependant on what I have been unable to obtain on my own. I am building my ability to alter my conscious perception of the world around me, and all these things seem to do is hold me back from the potential I know I am capable of being.
I heard something today that sat very well with me; I think to much about thinking.
I have been hearing for some time that I think to much, and yes I do think to much about thinking. However, I only feel the drags of doing that when I sit and question everything that happens around me. So I have been leaving my questioning towards the writings. My writings seem to be a great vent in my life. I am able to piece together my innermost thoughts in a legible and non-chaotic form.
This Zen music is beautiful isn't it? It is beautiful to my ears.
I do not so much anymore feel so much a questioning as to why things occur the way they do, but I do feel a sense of knowing why things happened. And that has been the most comforting and yet sometimes unsettling thing I have ever been able to embrace. For every answer as to why, there seems to be a conflict as to what I need to change internally. I stub my toe. "thank you god." "it was not gods fault" "well I have toes to stub and nerves to feel" And by this point there is no longer even a sensation of pain.
I am attempting to bring myself to a point where I accept everything just as it is, and I would like to help quiet my mind more so than it has been quieted already. Although I am beginning to feel more at peace, I have this overwhelming desire for more. As if more quietness will alleviate some-thing external.
I notice there that I am really attempting to be more self-aware of what is going on within my own mind. It is not that I needed to alleviate my mind, but rather show my mind that I am separate from it. And that I can honestly choose the reactions that I have to the mind itself. It is so much like I have heard and read; the path to peace is through what peace is not. For that is how we go from a place without peace, back to the peace we seek. And it is not so much that I seek peace, as that peace is really all there is for me to want.
I feel sometimes that the world around me is so chaotic that I want to withdraw and cocoon myself away from it, but when I really open my mind and heart to the world around me all I find is love. But love can be so scary to me because my mind wants to be so cold to it...but as I get deeper into my state I find that they meld together into a singularity, which I have learned to call serenity.
Today I was blessed with the ability to watch the movie The Theory of Everything, which is a great film about the life story of Stephen Hawking. I have to say that this movie was absolutely great. It really brought up a lot of my similar ideas. The seemingly hopeless wife stuck between her faith and her husband. The fact that God's mind would be a higher level of thinking. The love that we feel from our higher bodies was really resonate in this film. I found it oh-to-coincidental that the actor portraying our beloved Dr. Hawking is also the actor that plays a noble inter-dimensional "God" in the film Jupiter Ascending, but please do not get me going before I sit here all night ranting on and on about the half dozen conspiracy theories I could form up just about that. None the less I still do not know that actors name. Well I went ahead and searched up his name; Eddie Redmayn.
I have been battling my own mind attempting to train myself to love and appreciate my need to go back to highschool and finish for my diploma. In the world I choose to live within it is a requirement to push forward and strive to be the most educated being that I can be. And it makes me feel almost squashed to be required to go to school. I notice this about myself and would like to see a change in energy.
Perhaps I should refer to it as a shift. I would like to shift my negative energy into a more positive outlet, that way I can see that beautiful electric flow. And surely I have seen my share of godly tests in my endeavours. Just today I had three tests of my ability to maintain sobriety. Firstly, I met a group of two fellow energy beings testing their freedom by enjoying a fine drink of a favorite mind altering substance of mine marijuana. Secondly, on the way towards catching the bus I find half a rolled marijuana joint. Thirdly, I encounter old friends enjoying Tennessee Honey, which I almost thought was something safe to drink. I feel no negativity towards these events because I was capable to stick with my natural course. But all the while I still managed to trudge down the road of nicotine addiction.
In a simpler time I would not have worried about addiction. Heck, in a time like this I could easily do all the doing that I would like and still manage to live off the small wages provided for me. But I seek out more comfort than the need to be dependant on what I have been unable to obtain on my own. I am building my ability to alter my conscious perception of the world around me, and all these things seem to do is hold me back from the potential I know I am capable of being.
I heard something today that sat very well with me; I think to much about thinking.
I have been hearing for some time that I think to much, and yes I do think to much about thinking. However, I only feel the drags of doing that when I sit and question everything that happens around me. So I have been leaving my questioning towards the writings. My writings seem to be a great vent in my life. I am able to piece together my innermost thoughts in a legible and non-chaotic form.
This Zen music is beautiful isn't it? It is beautiful to my ears.
I do not so much anymore feel so much a questioning as to why things occur the way they do, but I do feel a sense of knowing why things happened. And that has been the most comforting and yet sometimes unsettling thing I have ever been able to embrace. For every answer as to why, there seems to be a conflict as to what I need to change internally. I stub my toe. "thank you god." "it was not gods fault" "well I have toes to stub and nerves to feel" And by this point there is no longer even a sensation of pain.
I am attempting to bring myself to a point where I accept everything just as it is, and I would like to help quiet my mind more so than it has been quieted already. Although I am beginning to feel more at peace, I have this overwhelming desire for more. As if more quietness will alleviate some-thing external.
I notice there that I am really attempting to be more self-aware of what is going on within my own mind. It is not that I needed to alleviate my mind, but rather show my mind that I am separate from it. And that I can honestly choose the reactions that I have to the mind itself. It is so much like I have heard and read; the path to peace is through what peace is not. For that is how we go from a place without peace, back to the peace we seek. And it is not so much that I seek peace, as that peace is really all there is for me to want.
I feel sometimes that the world around me is so chaotic that I want to withdraw and cocoon myself away from it, but when I really open my mind and heart to the world around me all I find is love. But love can be so scary to me because my mind wants to be so cold to it...but as I get deeper into my state I find that they meld together into a singularity, which I have learned to call serenity.
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